Saturday, February 21, 2009

A Guide to Girlie Shopping (by a guy)

Shopping Accomplice

- Get vibrant and excited about shopping vouchers given by the company.

- Plan your whole Saturday around a shopping trip.

- Enter the mall with no shopping requirements. Wander and do 'ooh aah' at the exciting displays.

- Eventually get sucked into a section in the store and start gaping.

- Start the process of excessive deselection, exasperation and confusion.

- When the flirtatious saleswoman says 'Oh, you looking so handsome lah', believe her.

- When the flirtatious saleswoman says that you resemble Barack Obama, believe her.

- Then proceed to check your face in the mirror and feel like Obama. Had you been in the right place and right time with the right pen, you too could have signed off a $789 billion deal.

- Flit from one trial room to another, leaving a trial of unhappy and crumpled shirts and trousers.

- When a bunch of saleswomen nod vigorously at your selection - trust them unconditionally.

- Take your friend's opinion to confuse yourself further.

- End up spending much beyond your original budget.

- Carry large shopping bags (with bright pink floral designs) out of the mall and gleefully walk on the street.

- Stop at a nearby suave coffee and celebrate your shopping expenditure with another overpriced concoction.

- Sip whipped cream topped cold coffee and joyfully relive the hours of shopping.

- Realize you've been doing something completely girly and hate yourself.

- Absolve your sins by being overtly masculine on Sunday (Beer and Bakwaas).

Party tonight!!

6 comments:

  1. Good one. Methinks guys probably do this kind of thing more than they let on.

    The sheepish grin in the pic is just spot on :)

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  2. do most stores have floral designs or did you shop at a ladeej store?

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  3. Ok, long ditzy comment... But i love this!

    "Flit from one trial room to another, leaving a trial of unhappy and crumpled shirts and trousers." leaves me unhappier. too many clothes that aren't right is very depressing.

    "When a bunch of saleswomen nod vigorously at your selection - trust them unconditionally." Noo. Trust your friend. rule no 1: all harmless sweet saleswoman have ulterior motives. ALL.

    "Take your friend's opinion to confuse yourself further." -always. you can sms them to say that you hate the bloody thing and blame it on them.

    "End up spending much beyond your original budget." Yes always. have three kinds budgets. cheap, breakable and the one that will mean that you have to do without a certain essential. the rule is to go beyond the third one, and cry about it later.

    "Carry large shopping bags (with bright pink floral designs) out of the mall and gleefully walk on the street." absolutely! also imagine that you look like Julia Roberts from pretty woman after that shopping scene.

    Beer and Bakwaas". That too. To prove to yourself that you're girl enough to shop, and balanced enough to unwind over beer.

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  4. dai iyervaall innada panren.. nama japam pandra.... chumma ethavathe pannittu. unnakku enna western cultura da mukyam ambi????

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  5. We girls are vindicated I say!

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