Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Guitar Blues


previous blog - week 3

Day 1 was consummate - Uncle was friendly. Aunty smiled. Tea was seconded by namkeen. Boy looked cute.
Day 2 was annoying - Aunty meant business. She influenced song selection. She served tea tardily.
Day 3 was terrible - Aunty was a royal pain in the ass. Aunty was a royal pain in the ass.

And now you can imagine what Day 4 was.
See, money was never an issue for me - sorry, incorrect usage. Money has never been an issue for me. Apart from a month long stint at an architectural firm, I have never actually been PAID for anything. It took a lot of effort to bargain for this job sans embarrasment. It took a lot of tenacity to endure Aunty's Antics - "beta haan. wo fast bajao."..."Arre, aapne Shivam ko kuch sikhaaya hi nahi"..."Shivam beta, paani pee lo".

Day 4

Time was around 7:10pm. I had already spent one and a half hours at the Gupta Household. Aunty was at my left side, grinning with pride (Did she not notice me looking at the watch ?). Shivam beta sat in front of me - performing a fragmented Dil Chahta Hai. He was possibly preparing it for the next Aunty get-together, where Sharma Aunty (standard envious-cum-enviable neighbour caricature) would get to see him perform this spectacle.

Earlier in this class, Aunty ji had specifically picked out bits of the song, and smirked everytime - "Beta, ye to aapne sikhaaya hi nahi". I tried explaining the trilogy of chords, lead and bass and what exactly I had in mind. Aunty understood nothing of whatever I said. Shivam of course nodded and agreed with whoever he thought was echoing his opinion. So much for guru-loyalty. I complied and added bits and pieces of the song to the tabs.
Finally, Shivam ended his recital. I squeezed out every drop of bashfulness and said, "Aunty,,,ahem..my money ?". Aunty moved her royal butt and smiled at me. And then began Haggling part 2.

Haggling Part 2

"Mrs.Gupta, aap to bahut zyaada de rahe ho. i think X should be enough. 2X to tuition waale bhi nahi lete." - Sharma Aunty

Sharma Aunty had screwed up Gupta Aunty's perception so badly that she backed out of our previous deal- "Beta, we had aggreed upon Rs 2X. But everyone was saying that it is too much. So I think you should come twice a week, as we talked last time. But we'll pay you the same money."
I was appalled. All the 15 hindi gaalis I perfected in Kharagpur ran over and over again in my brain. I smiled and politely rejected the whole idea. They possibly thought that examples of their paisa vasool values and policies would probably inspire me.

Paisa Vasool Examples

Apparently, they had tried out a few JEE tutors (all students of iit). The ones that impressed them were those who stayed for 2-3 hours (while they were being paid for an hour). Some obnoxious girl actually had the nerve to leave after an hour. How rude ! Her services were terminated quickly.
"Beta aise guitar-witaar jaise classes mein time kuch nahi hota. Aapko to 3-4 ghante baithna chahiye."
I was appalled. All the 15 hindi gaalis I perfected in Kharagpur ran over and over again in my brain. I smiled and politely rejected the whole idea. Then Uncle entered.
"Beta, aap ke kaam karo. Ab se 1 ghanta nahi, poore 2 ghante baitho". Aah..The beautiful art of guitaring reduced to a 2 hour detention period. A lot of things concurrently bruised me at that moment - the fact that they had no respect whatsoever for music ; that the 2 hours mattered to them more than what their son learnt; that they thought they knew my job better than I did.

I swallowed all the shit. It was payment day. i collected the money, wished everyone goodnight and walked out. I wish I could have had fun doing this. I wish Aunty wouldn't be so mean. I wish I had the courage to tell Aunty to...

2 comments:

  1. No respect at all.....you gotta take guitar seriously even if no one else does. Very amusing tale!

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